Making Life Sweet

Last week one of my duchesses came to spend some time with me.  We went to Vacation Bible School a couple of nights.  She is too young for the groups we had classes for, but we hung out and wandered around visiting with folks.  She was interested in arts and crafts and ice cream!  Our menfolk made homemade ice cream the last evening of VBS. I was so engrossed in her I didn’t even taste any of it for myself.  She didn’t like the large group portions because it was so loud.  I think she still had fun.

I have a small blow-up pool for the backyard.  Both duchesses love to play in the water.  However, the red wasps have been buzzing across the grass and Duchess One was distressed by them because she had gotten stung a while back.  Serious pain even for an old girl like me; no doubt it was bad for her, even as tough as she is.

There is a small zoo about an hour away.  She and I went to visit the animals and ride the train.  We road the train first and then went to see the animals.  Her favorite animal is the giraffe. My favorite are the flamingos and I love jaguars, too.  The jaguar came right up to the fence about five feet away and was pacing back and forth.  We were fortunate to be present during courting season for the pea fowl.  The peacocks roam freely through the grounds of the zoo.  We saw several males in full tail display, including a white one.  She was most impressed with it.  We road the train again when we left the zoo. 

Here at Granny’s, there aren’t many rules. Don’t do unsafe things, don’t act ugly, don’t tear stuff up just to be doing it.  Otherwise, let’s have fun.  Projects are fun!  Paper, crayons, scissors, glue and GLITTER!!  We have glitter all over the place.  And I love it! She went home Friday and I haven’t vacuumed the carpet on the porch yet.  I love glitter, too. There is glitter all over the floor from one end of the house to the other.  I told my son (her Daddy) that when I tell him I poop glitter, he’d better believe it! I found some glitter on my food, too! Paw Paw pointed out there is glitter all over the carport and driveway from the last couple of times we played in the treasure bed, too.

Hot lava is a thing.  I had some little sticky notes I scattered across the tiles from the porch, to the kitchen, down the hall and into the living room.  Those stayed several days for entertainment.  It will certainly be a repeat.

My other Duchess is in Colorado with her mother and some friends.  She is having a ball!  I got a call yesterday from her.  She wanted to tell me she was eating Cheetos.  Just wanted Granny to know. She won’t be home till next month.  I had her come stay a few days before she left.  I will need to keep her a few days when she gets back.  Fill up on loving from her, too. It will be zoo time again.

Granny hasn’t been to the beach in too long a time.  I like riding the ferry and going to Murdock’s. My daughter and I used to go for my birthday in July.  This time all three of us can go.  Daughter, Duchess Two and me. 

Two Duchesses. Or Princesses as Paw Paw calls them.  They certainly make life sweeter.  I remember how I felt about both of my Grannies. I hope they love me at least half as much as I loved mine.  Even now, the love those two women showed me sustain me when I struggle with life.  I pray I will make such a difference for my girls.  That now and when I am gone, the love I have for them makes a difference for them.

Unexpected Moments

I had a visit with my aunts yesterday. My mind is flooded with memories. I don’t have clear 8mm movie memories. I have Polariod memories. Fuzzy snapshots of moments in time.  I am sitting in the back yard of the house I grew up in.  It was a field of corn plowed by my Daddy once upon a time.

I asked again about the table. My grandmother, Arie Eola Brown Hamm, had my grandfather, Charley Richard Hamm, build her a table large enough so that even me and John Bullet could sit with the family for dinner.

She loved for everyone to dress up for Christmas dinner. I have a photo of my gorgeous father in a suit and tie for one Christmas.  How beautiful life was then.

My mother recounted a note that Granny Arie was disappointed when Mother gave Daddy work clothes for Christmas instead of dress clothes.  Perhaps that is the complete synopsis of my completely ambiguous mind.

My beloved LuLu and I are planning on a 20/20 Vision for 2020.

I know what dreams Rock and I are having. We have a vision for the future. We are ready to step out into a new life together. He will understand when he reads this.  My focus and understanding of a particular part of my “style” has become clear only after our new dream appeared. And that new dream only appeared when I surrendered.  To Him, to Rock, and to the Future. And also surrendered the past.

Mama isn’t ever coming home.  I can stop waiting for her to return.

**wrote the above a while back. Don’t know why I didn’t post it.

But, today, I cried. After all this time, LuLu and I got around to a conversation that revealed she knew my Mama from working at the hospital.  This conversation came about in a winding way as conversations do between two women who love each other like we do. She is my sister. In spirit rather than flesh. May I say amid all the current conflict that our skin tones are different and we have never cared one whit about the difference. But, I cried today just discovering that my sister knew my Mother. So, Mama does still come home sometimes.