More Connections

Friends, friends, and more friends!

Friday with a couple at their special place simply referred to as “the hill”.  We hadn’t seen them in nine months.  Just that couple of hours were wonderful.  Touching each other’s lives again.  Feeling like we had never been apart.

Saturday a road trip took him and me to spend the next 24 hours or so with our bestie.  Our best friend and I have been friends since I was 14.  When I met my husband, they also became best buddies.  Our friend has a lovely wife and three of the most wonderful sons I have ever met.  Crawfish, huge delicious crawfish were on the menu for supper.  Lots of laughs with the larger group of their friends.

Sunday, home and a nap!  My porch felt wonderful!  I laid up and read a book all evening.

Monday morning brought severe weather to our area.  Many of our neighbors and friends are still without power.  Thankfully, ours came back on earlier this afternoon.  He spent a good part of his day going round the neighborhood helping neighbors with trees and clearing the side roads.

We did get to see another couple of our friends.  She is a precious lady in my life.  I can go to her with my heartaches and my happiness and her compassion never ceases to amaze me.

Our son sent video posts of the amazing waterfalls on the road to Hana.  One of the videos has his voice in the background.  It is just a passing word or two.  But, I listened to it over a couple of times.  Just to hear him.  Yes, we can call on the phone.  But, the time difference and the reception on his end along with my job place restrictions regarding cell phones reduce the window of opportunity for that.

The best part of the past few days was this evening.  My daughter turned 28 today.  I cannot begin to describe her endless wonderful qualities.  I would certainly be accused of exaggeration by those who do not know her and scolded by those who do for leaving out their favorite thing about her.  Generous to a fault, incredibly smart, energetic, creative, compassionate, sassy, stubborn, beautiful……her father and I were blessed with a brief supper date this evening.  We had planned on a slightly grander event, but the weather put us off from that trip.  Still, no matter where we are or what we do, time with her is all that matters.

Orchids pouring like the waterfalls of Hana, like the powerful storms of a Texas spring, like the love of friends and family.  Filling my life and my heart with a lovely fragrance and beautiful blooms.

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Train Wreck

Today, I feel like a train wreck.

I didn’t do what I had planned and prepared to do on Saturday.  Instead, I went with him to the woods.  Twofold.  Dust, pollen, jarring ride made for physical problems.  Failure to achieve my Saturday goals made for mental stress.  Stop watching the water already gone under the bridge.

Sunday was bittersweet.  Yes. I had time with my family.  But, the guest of honor was not able to join us due to her illness.  We shed tears.   But, we laughed as well.  We scheduled another event.

Caught up in our own busy-ness, we let weeks turn to months and then to years.  Let us put away regret and remorse.  Let us stand hand in hand laughing and loving as we go.  We have some tough bridges to cross together.

Today was just Monday.  Too many demands on my mind and my time.  The day started badly.  It slowly improved.  Now, I am simply tired.   The evening is bridging my day into night.

Upon my arrival home, he had fresh coffee made.  We had a bite of supper and I washed up the dishes.  Then he sent me to get a bath.  “You have orchiding to do.”

So here I am.  Tapping away.  Yawning.  Trying to string together words that might make sense.  Like boxcars on a track.  One word after another.  Trying not to derail as I cross over the trestle bridging into sleep.

Sleep is no relief.  I either don’t sleep well or my dreams are too vivid.  Oh, well.  I don’t think this post is  chugging along well.  Maybe I should have written about the turtle instead.

 

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Sinking In

I am always reading self-improvement things.  Books, blogs, magazine articles, whatever.  Always seeking a magical answer.  The question isn’t really clear.  I cannot find a magical answer if I don’t know the magical question.

One concept I have often read about is breaking down the project into manageable tasks.  I am a very organized person.  I always think about projects and plan them in what I believe is the most sensible and efficient order.

Then, I begin said project.  I follow the plan.  The problem seems to be that I believe I can do more than I can do. I overextend myself.  I get halfway through and run out of time and/or energy.

I don’t know if I am just trying to do too much or if I am not planning a well as I think or what.  I just know I end up with a mess to clean up and a project not completed the way I imagined.  It is finally sinking in that I need to not only think of the project in steps, but I need to do the project in steps and stages.  Don’t try to change my entire world on Friday evening and Saturday afternoon.

The next chapter of this saga is about purpose.  I plan a project.  I think about the area I want to improve.  I set about the stages of the project.  I realize I am only trying to distract myself from something else.  I get bored because it is being done for the wrong reason.

If I have a project to complete, I don’t have to think about not achieving the real goals.  I can fool myself into thinking I am busy taking care of important issues.  But, only for a little while.

Suddenly, the curtain is drawn back and the truth comes out.  The great Oz is a fraud and a fake.  The truth is in the ruby slippers always with me.  Just get on with it.  The way is there.  Stop following someone else’s yellow brick road and get back to home base.  Get centered and grounded and back on the real track.

I have set myself a task and a deadline to meet it.  He is backing me 100%.  He is my partner in this life and my champion, too.  Together, we will get me where I need to be.  Following my own brick road.  Not the yellow one.

It is finally sinking in.  I must be true to myself.  I must follow my own path.  I must stop trying to take part in things I care nothing about.  Most of all, I must stop running away from my destiny.  The line in a movie that haunts me and my son:  find and fulfill your destiny.  Perhaps, it isn’t so hard to find after all.

Keep paying attention.  Keep listening to my instincts.  Keep battling the fear.  Keep pushing back the mindless distractions.  Keep pursuing life and destiny and love and truth.

 

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