I’m sitting at the south window of our bedroom looking out at sun dappled woods. The pale winter sky peaks through a mix of intricate gray lace and pine green plumes.
This is my darkest month. I have always struggled with the cold dark days of February. The odd thing about my trouble is that I love the winter. I love all the seasons in their turn. It doesn’t seem logical that I would struggle emotionally through any of them. I love the steel gray of the low sky that comes with the Southeast Texas winter. The long shadows that stretch across the land and the colored leaves which cling to trees till spring ones push them off at last.
I have promised myself I will do all the things needed to not let the bottom fall out of my emotions. What are all the things? Seeking sunlight at every opportunity. Lighting candles everywhere. Soaking in a hot tub of bath water in the evenings. Getting fully dressed even when staying in for the day. Riding with him when he goes on cow business. Making time for friends. Making time for Duchesses. Making myself see the beauty around me.
I have set myself a real challenge. This Valentine weekend, I plan to have both Duchesses spend two nights. We may go to a birthday party Saturday I’ve been invited to or we may stay here and have the tea party I had already planned. It will depend on how well we all sleep Friday night for the most part.
Thinking about the weekend, making plans, gathering supplies, making ready has been a very good way to keep the gloomies at bay. Looking forward to all the love and affection exchanged between the three of us is a perfect way to keep my heart up.
Most importantly, I am trusting in the Lord to comfort me as He always has. Rock helps me get through this. I have him and some others who pray specifically for my difficult days of winter.
This year they don’t seem so dark after all…………………
I didn’t post last week. I was too tired and too late getting home from Liberty. I had gone to our daughter’s Monday and spent the night. We finished up moving her housekeeping to her new house.
I never could have imagined how quiet a room could be right in the middle of town. The front bedroom was painfully quiet. I had trouble going to sleep. I did finally get to sleep only to be awakened by the train whistle about 3 AM or so. Several trains passed through. I was sure they must be going through the next room! They aren’t as loud in other parts of the house. Something about the location and windows and lack of other noise along with it being unfamiliar to me made them sound terribly loud.
Duchess was asleep in the bed with me. She never moved. She has been hearing trains for years. Not as close or as loud, but still more familiar. My niece lives within hearing of a train and I would hear it all night when I stayed with her. Something about that sound awakens me.
We spent Thanksgiving with another couple whose grown children were at other places. Our son and his bride and Duchess were partying with Mickey and Minnie and Elsa in Florida. Our daughter and I decided to wait till they could be here to all have dinner together. Our son will be away after all. But we still want to get the Duchesses together for some turkey and yeast bread and green bean casserole.
Our daughter, two friends and Duchess and I went to the Renaissance Festival Friday. I always hope it will be less crowded. Shouldn’t all those people be shopping? It seemed to be even more crowded than the Saturday we went in October. I think the last time I went on Black Friday it was super crowded, too.
Weekend before last, our daughter and Duchess came and spent the night so daughter could go hunt with her Daddy. Some friends came and brought some heifers back to us. We had gumbo and a good visit.
This past Sunday evening, my friend brought her dress over so we could hem it. It is a gorgeous navy lace encrusted with sequins and beads. She is wearing it for her son’s wedding. We will be attending the event and I can’t wait to see her all decked out in it.
I hope Rock and I get a good photograph of us, too. We don’t have many pictures of each other and even fewer of us together. We will be dressed up some and it would be a good opportunity.
Busy. In the best possible way. Spending time with our children and friends. We will see some family this weekend, too. Big brother turning the big 6-0. Older Duchess having a party for the big 5. And Christmas coming up fast. Busy and trying to be careful to savor the moments.