Wintertime (Spring) Cleaning

I am definitely not trying to hasten spring. The winter is needed. I simply want to be ready for the spring when it does arrive.  Here in this part of the world, the spring flowers will be blooming by early March. Summer arriving by mid-May or sooner. I want to be done with the clearing out and cleaning up and rearranging and deciding now, when the wind is chill and the skies gray and sullen. When the jasmine covers the pines, I want to be ready to get out there and smell it.

Once upon a time, houses were heated by coal or wood. Kerosene, fat candles, gaslight were used to see in the twilight days.  The soot made it needful to wash everything down in the spring at the returning of the warm sunshine. It would be too soon to clean in the midst of the winter. One would wait until the windows could be flung open and freshness could blow through the home.  These days, in our air tight dwellings, there is little fresh air any time without deliberateness of the housekeeper.

This is a new time for me. I have retired. Not since I was 20 something have I had the leisure to plan my work over days and weeks rather than around school schedules, care of parents, working days. It does not seem to appeal to women these days to want to simply keep house. It is difficult for even me who loves to keep house to find “permission” to do just that.  I have a nagging in my mind that I am wasting valuable time and energy in such a mundane pursuit. 

But is my pursuit mundane? According to the Lord, any productive work is honorable done with the right heart.  Washing dishes and mopping the floor are honorable tasks.  It is needful for a home to run well. So why shouldn’t I give myself permission to pursue what has all along been my dream? Keeping a well-run house.

I had the privilege of doing so in the early days of our marriage. And when I did seek outside employment, it was in a capacity that allowed generous time off to continue keeping house.  It was later, when a job change reduced my time allowance, when grief continued to mount with continuing losses of my family members, when the little birds flew away from the nests as warrior eagles on their own, then my home became more difficult to attend.  My heart was lonely and the tasks felt meaningless in my sadness.

How is retirement? I am at almost five months along with it.  I have been busy with granddaughters and holidays and learning the tasks of a very part time job. It isn’t “new year resolutions” driving me at this time. It is simply timing.  Holidays past, decorations to put away, weather conditions conducive to being indoors more. I decided rather haphazardly this would be a good time to do some clearing out of things.

First was to go through the decorations I didn’t use this year to see of what to dispose. Then to decide what I used this year but didn’t love and get those things gone.  Since I currently use the washroom for storage, I went through things out there, too.  I have hauled away a few bags already.  The washroom seems organized. I only have two tubs of Christmas decorations, the tree itself, and three ornament boxes.  I also have a tub of antlers and a tub of pine cones. The cones were brought to me from California by our son.  I use them and the antlers in table centerpieces. 

Next, I have gathered “projects” on the back porch (sunroom sounds too uppity). It is down to do it or dump it.  I have a bad habit of going to thrift stores and picking up things to “makeover” then getting the materials to do the makeover only to box it up and stuff it in the closet.  Excuses of I don’t have time, I’m not sure how to start, I have no place to set up to work, I don’t know what to do with the finished project.  Where would I display or use whatever it is?  Who could I give it to? I am trying to break the acquisition habit.  I believe this ultimatum I have given myself may work to strengthen my resolve to keep my focus on what I actually do want to spend time and effort doing.

What is that?  I love to embroider.  I like reading and I love writing.  I have a half dozen or more stories begun or first drafts done. I do like to keep house, cook, do yardwork.  I still have him to look after.  He needs the care I give him.  Of course he can get along without me.  But, isn’t life sweeter when I take the time to take care of him?  He isn’t difficult to tend anyway.  A good supper, clean clothes, an occasional haircut, a simple lunch packed for work, a ride up the road to see the cows.  He can be a bit cantankerous, but then so can I.  He’s worth every bit of it and more.

Starting this new year, this new month, right here in the middle of a Southeast Texas “winter”, I am clearing out and cleaning up.  Setting up for the coziness needed now. Setting up for the long season of outdoor living afforded by this part of the world through early springs, long summers and warm falls.

I have no idea what tomorrow will bring. I don’t even know how this day will play out and end.  But I am ever so grateful I know the One who does.  I have been through many dark times and no doubt will be through many more.  But His light of hope has sustained me even through my weeping and mourning.  As painful as things have been, I am grateful to find myself not bitter.  I am grateful to find myself not stuck in the mire of self-pity that I fall in to at times. 

My life is not charmed; not full of blissful days.  I have been through bad times. I have made bad decisions. I have behaved poorly.  I used to criticize myself brutally for my failures.  Somewhere I heard the phrase: how arrogant I must be to think that the blood of Christ is not good enough for my sins.  That is what is boils down to for me.  I am too bad for the blood of Christ to work on me and the Spirit to work in me and through me.  That was the lie I believed.  That was my mountain to climb.  It is a slippery slope going up, but I continue to gain altitude. It is only by seeking Jesus, I will be able to summit the peak.

How raw and open is my confession.  How vulnerable I have allowed myself to be.  If you are reading this, please know I will have wrangled with myself to allow it posted. This is not how I intended this to go.  I suppose I needed to hear it. 

I am looking toward the coming days with expectancy. Seeking an ever-sweeter walk with Christ, an ever more tender connection with Him and with him. Moments of delight with our children and our little grand girls.  Deeper connections with friends and extended family. If I can provide encouragement or a little cheer to the hurting, I pray I am allowed to do so.  

Pain will come this year. I pray I am quick to seek Him for courage, strength, guidance, comfort.

Blessings will come this year. I pray I am not blind to see them. I pray I am quick to praise Him for them.

Already feeling the blessing of today.  The comfort of simply knowing Jesus.  May you know Him, too.

Armadillo Blessing

To anyone reading this who knows me and is still wondering if I am touched in the head, this will leave no doubt, most likely.

I was blessed with an armadillo under the porch. I have been hearing him over the past couple of months and finally this past Sunday morning, he was caught outside.  Caught with a bullet, by him. Not me.  But, he ran back under the porch.  So, suddenly the situation became disastrous rather than a concern. It was a concern because we have a dog and a cat. An armadillo is a potentially disease carrying critter that could become an issue with one of the pets.  Now it was a disaster because I probably had a dead armadillo under the porch.  In July. In Southeast Texas. In a heat wave. If you don’t understand from that, you wouldn’t be able to imagine.

Our house is on a slab, but the porch is pier and beam. He pulled some of the skirting off.  No sign of the critter.  He decided it was as good a time as any to pull out the back stoop that was in need of replacement.  He might be able to see from that angle.  Still no sign of the critter.

He did notice that the air-conditioned air was flowing freely between the cracks in the floor under the carpet.

Let me back up a bit.  This back room started as a screened porch. But, it was too cold in the winter and too hot in the summer.  We don’t have anything in between much here.  Mama had windows and a window unit a/c installed. She had indoor/outdoor carpet put down. The carpet was to keep the mosquitos from coming through the cracks that had developed between the floor boards that were just wide enough for them. We replaced the window units with central air and I just open the French doors to cool or heat it.  After all these years, the carpet is still in decent shape, but has a few stains and a lot of set in dust. I have been wanting to replace it with stained plywood.  I saw that in a place that was on Village Creek at a wedding reception years ago and I think it would be perfect here.

So he noticed the central air flowing right through the floor cracks and indicated the porch could no longer be air-conditioned until after the floor has been corrected.  It has been running in the upper 90s for a while now. I should have been upset. Remember the armadillo under the porch?  The dead one?

Another factor involved in this very complicated story is that I am on vacation, or staycation this week, if you would rather call it that.  I never work on my birthday, so I took off last Friday. And I like to be off for a week this time of year and stay home puttering around the house.  So, I am off all this week. First time I have done this in years.  My time off in recent years has been spent traveling to Hawaii, California and Houston. Traipsing after my children and granddaughters.  I have really needed this week off at home.

Here is the miracle. There is no smell from the armadillo that is dead under the porch.  Did he have a hole that deep? Did he make it out and away into the woods before he died?  There is no smell.  I thank my Heavenly Father for the very personal favor He has shown me in this matter.  I can think nothing else.

He will be replacing the back stoop in a day or two. And all the skirting will be replaced. We may have to wait till the jungle subsides in the cold for that.  And the floor on the porch will be redone sooner rather than later.  He has a lot on his plate these days.  So, the armadillo wasn’t a blessing for him. Still, I am glad for it.

Here is the blessing for me and why you will finally know I am not quite right in the head.  I have enjoyed not having a/c on the porch.  Years ago, I spent most of my summers outdoors.  As kids, we all played outside.  There wasn’t any a/c going in the house anyway.  And later as a young adult I just stayed outside.  I would take a book out to a shady spot and enjoy the heat, the sounds, the feel of summer.  I sit at a desk in a windowless office all year these days.  I love being on the porch. I love it now with all the windows open and the fan blowing and feeling the summer, again.  Oh, I have been in and out throughout the days.  I have all that puttering to do.  But, I return to sit out here and listen to the cicadas and the birds and the hum of the fan.  Feeling alive and at peace in the Texas Heat.

FullSizeRender (29)