memories

A Weekend of Orchids

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What a wonderful weekend!

I spent time with my aunt and my beloved cousin working on a special project.  How wonderful it was to have time with my cousin not sitting at the side of her hospital bed.  She is the toughest, frailest woman I know and I love her dearly.

I spent time with him.  We traveled to my niece’s home to attend her little girl’s first birthday party.  Our littlest great-niece holds his heart in her little hand.  He adores her and she adores him.  We went early to get some special time with the family.

We were able to help my niece and her husband get things together for the party.  I love the two of them so much.  She was the first child in her generation and I was still at home when she came along.  She was my first baby to love.  Her husband is such a loving, dear man.  He is precious and funny and I am always glad to see him.

The day also brought a moment or two to hug my brother and my wonderful sister-in-law.  My nephew and his sweet wife were there with their charming little boys.  It was great to see them!

Sunday morning brought a surprise to my door.  One of our “like family” friends came to visit.  We were expecting him and thought his wife was coming.  Instead he brought his mother.  She and my mother were best friends growing up.  It was wonderful to spend time with the two of them.  Our visits are usually as part of a large, loud crowd when we all gather.

We don’t all gather nearly often enough.  Mother had us all together three or four times a year and smaller groups rounded up in between those times.  Daddy was either on the ship or didn’t mind when he was home or didn’t say if he did mind.

I will not dwell on that.  We have plans in the works to gather some more.  I have a milestone birthday coming in the summer.  Time for a big party!  Meanwhile,  some smaller gatherings……….perhaps not so far away from Mother’s way afterall.

A note about the photograph.  It is a camping spot we used often and referred to as “the point”.  It is a short walk from my home and is full of memories for the people who loved my mother and her gatherings.  The park is only open for pedestrian day visitors now.  But, there are many ghosts of memories………..

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Dreams

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I love the night. When I am outside sitting around a fire with friends.  Or when I am walking down a moonlit sandy road. Or sitting on the porch listening to the night sounds.

I don’t love the night when my dreams become tumultuous and full of drama. I did not post last evening.  I went to bed very early again.  I am battling the symptoms of the illness that plagues me.  My dreams did not allow peaceful rest.

I have always dreamed in full action Technicolor and remember much of details and moods. Some dreams I never forget.  They live in my memory as if they really happened.  Sometimes a dream mood will stay with me after I awake. I have had dream moods stay with me for days.

I have learned to redirect dreams even while sleeping through them. I will awaken remembering how a dream was deteriorating into a nightmare and I had changed the scenes to avoid disaster.  I don’t always have success, though.  Last night, the dream deteriorated into chaos and panic.  I woke myself to get out of the hysterical state I had entered.

I wake up still tired many mornings. Some would avoid sleep to avoid such problems.  There is a good side to this.  Many of my dreams are better than a movie.  Adventure, beautiful scenery, even good drama.  I love when I have those good dreams.

Recently, I had a clear and vivid dream of his mother. She has been gone from us many years, but in my dream I got a wonderful hug from her and could hear her voice and see her clearly.

It happens sometimes. Someone I love who has passed on will appear in my dreams.  Clear and well and full of love.  I will take the bad dreams if it means I will also have the good dreams.  Dreams that become memories as surely as if they happened in life and not just in my mind.

 

 lake photos