Living

Well, I did not get everything done as I had hoped. I did get rid of almost everything that is not in progress or does not fit my vision or still hold interest for me.

I will claim the rainy weather as part of the problem. Hard to paint furniture out on the carport when it is raining.

The small box of fabric is still here. I have not been willing to let it go. When I went through it, the projects I want to do are still viable and I am still interested.

The ceramic mermaid is still on the counter getting additional layers of paint whenever I get a chance. She is almost finished.

I am going to “blame” him for not cutting the hooks from the fishing lures, yet. My cutters and my hands are not strong enough. I plan to hang them from cord on the porch or maybe in the living room.

I did succeed in editing things. I have let go of a few things. I am still trying to make time and room for what I want to expend energy doing.

The main thing for me is that I have not given up. Never give up. Never give in. That saying about increasing your success rate by increasing your failure rate. Fall down seven times, get up eight.

I am closer to my final goal than before. I am allowing a mess to be present on my kitchen counter while I experience creative expression. I am still trying. I have not boxed it all up and stuffed it all back in the closet and retreated to the veil of sadness.

Maybe the goal is the problem. Maybe I haven’t set the goal clearly or properly. Maybe what I think I want is not what I really want. Perhaps tomorrow things will be clearer.

At least I am a few limbs higher on the magnolia tree. I’m not sure if I have clearly explained what the reference to the magnolia tree means in previous posts. Next week, I may try to tell it.

Meanwhile, I will continue to collect orchids as they rain down in my life. Supper last Friday with my daughter and him, many phone calls from my son sharing his and her experiences in paradise, time in the beautiful woods, keeping company with that man of mine, tons of birthday wishes received. Simple things. Beautiful life. Orchids raining.

For my entire memory, I have loved tropical things. Seas, jungles, birds, fish, flowers, foods. My Granny Sally made me a “ta-ta” out of a jungle print of leaves and animals backed with brown corduroy. I still have it. It is one of my treasures.
My mother used a queen sheet to cover the opening to the living room to allow the window unit to cool that room while we watched television in the evenings. It was also an African animal jungle print. It hangs in our house a few feet from where she used it.
Banana trees and elephant ears have always been among my very favorite plants. The exotic mimosas that populate my part of Texas and bloomed at my Granny Arie’s house are dear to my heart. Rich man’s grass aka pampas grass is another favorite of mine. I am accumulating some things.
I have been working again toward a tropical garden. I am making great progress. I did not expect my dear husband to assist the way he has. He has given me generous gifts toward it. He has encouraged me and offered real labor assistance often. I am very grateful!
The palm tree he bought me years ago seems to have finally decided to put on some height. Its growth spurt has symbolic meaning for me. I am finally creeping out of my dormant state and into a new period of growth as well, it seems.
Before next week’s post, I will turn 49. Nearly half a century. I intend to live the next half a century being kinder to myself, truer to myself. Growing myself into the fullness of my being and growing my garden into the fullness of a jungle garden that lingers from the daydreams of my childhood. It is my intention.