He and I have been married 36 years today. We were both 18 when we decided there was no other way to be than married to each other. We have been through tough times and wonderful times. We have learned to forgive and keep going on together.
We still have some big dreams we hope to make come true if the Father wills it so. Funny thing about dreams for us. We always ask him to close the door firmly if we are about to go through the wrong one.
We are a pretty good team for the most part. I’m still a terrible cow dog, though. I’m not scared at all, just slow and clumsy. Still we usually manage to get done what needs doing without having to do too much of the previously mentioned forgiving.
I love this man of mine. In ways I cannot even express. I sometimes can’t tell where I end and he begins. I have tried so hard to bind myself to him.
He is strong and tough. Sometimes the tough is hard to take. I haven’t had to slay a dragon in many years. His sword is sharp and arrow is true. So I don’t mind the tough.
The past few weeks have been trying. Several areas of my life have been in turmoil. I came home early from the 9 to 5 Monday. I couldn’t stop crying.
I did what was needed to manage the situation. A little dinner, a little nap, a lot of Scripture and prayer. By the evening, I was better. Drained, but better.
Tuesday was better and today is going fine. Tomorrow is Friday Eve. So all is well.
The weekend holds promise for a blessed time with the clowns…I mean the girls. Our party theme is clowns and our menu is salads. I am going retro with a Jell-O molded shrimp salad. I was thinking maybe my aunt’s Southwestern Salad would be a good one, too.
I should not have been so down after Saturday’s adventures. Fishing, breakfast at the lake, a nap, a buggy ride at the lease. He and I had a great day. I was feeling ill on and off all day Saturday, though. I still don’t know if I was stressed and depressed or fighting a real illness. That is the thing about the depression. It simulates the symptoms of a cold or the early stages of the flu. Body aches, fatigue, fuzzy head. I usually manage the thoughts and feelings pretty well. Especially the thoughts. The feelings and the body symptoms are the difficult part to manage.
A lot of prayer, some rest, some talking to golden friends, his nurturing love, His nurturing Love, all worked together to put me on track.
The cherry on top was a short video of a high-kicker from Cali! That made everything grand, again! Funny how grands will do that!
I cannot overstate how grateful I am for the healing I have experienced the past few years. Recovering from the devastating grief our family has suffered has been a slow process. I still reel from it if I let myself think too much about who is missing in our lives. But, the future is full of hope. The future is full of beauty. The future is full of love. All the love from all the past loved ones will continue into the future through our generation to the next.
I recently read a book that asked what I would want to be remembered for at my passing. I hope I am remembered for believing in love and the power it holds to restore and renew and prosper the mind, heart and spirit.